Yi imani, wannan ba abu ne mai ban mamaki ba: muna yin wani abu, kuma ayyukanmu sun danganci cigaba, wadataccen rayuwar yau da kullum da kuma farin ciki na ƙaunatacciyar ƙaunatacciyar duniya da tsada - kuma a lokaci guda, ainihin aikin wannan mummunan kuma bamu fahimta ba, menene wannan - ilimi. Bari muyi ƙoƙarin fahimta.
A sakamakon "ilimin pedagogical" yaron ya canza. A kowane hali, dole ne ya canza. Wannan yana nufin cewa muna da rashin amincewa da yadda yake yanzu.
Zai yiwu, ko da yaron da kansa - a cikin fahimtarsa - ba farin ciki ba ne. Kuma muna so yaro ya canza a tsawon lokaci. "Wannan, a ganina, a bayyane yake. Idan muna son 'ya'yanmu su kasance kamar yadda suke, to babu wani samuwa da zai zama dole. Na farko, bari mu yi kokarin fahimtar abin da, a gaskiya, ba ya dace da mu a cikin yara. Kuma abin da ake nufi daidai lokacin da suka ce: "Yarinya marar ɗaci ne".
Tarihin ba tsammani
Bari mu juya zuwa wallafe-wallafe. Kornei Ivanovich Chukovsky a cikin shahararren littafinsa "Daga biyu zuwa biyar" ya ba da labari: wani yarinya yana zaune a teburin, a gabanta tana da gilashi tare da caramel da daya cakulan cakulan. Yana da kyau sosai!) Babu shakka: abun da ke da ƙanshin cakulan ya fi dadi fiye da caramels, kuma shine kawai, sabuwar, yanzu wani daga wani balagagge zai ci shi, kuma ba zai same ni ba.Kara-ul! Yana da gaggawa don yin wani abu!
Yarinyar, ta juya wa mahaifiyarsa ta ce:
"Mummy, ka dauki wadannan kyawawan mutane, kuma zan dauki wannan datti ɗaya," kuma, yin wani abu mai banƙyama, yana ɗaukar alewa cakulan.
Duba, abin da ke kula da mutum! Ta zabi kyandar cakulan ba saboda son kai ba, ba saboda ta ji tsoro ba: ba zato ba tsammani wani zai ci shi, amma yarinya ba zai samu ba - a'a! Ta kula da mahaifiyata. Sai dai itace cewa alewa cakulan ba shi da kyau - datti. A caramel - m, m - kyau. Kuma yanzu jaruminmu, da yin hadaya da kanta, tare da ƙyama ya cinye wannan shunin "datti", kuma ya bar wasu tsofaffi mara kyau!
Wane daraja! Mene ne karimci!
Kuma yanzu bari mu kula da komai duka. Yarinyar, a gaskiya, ya san cewa albashin cakulan yana da kyau, mafi kyaun caramel, don haka sai ta dauka daidai, kuma Uwa ta bar shi ya fi muni. A bayyane, aikin ɗan ya motsa da sha'awar sha'awar kansa, ba tare da bukatu da bukatun wasu (kuma mafi kusa) mutane ba: yawanci muna kira wannan haɓaka. An sani cewa psyche da hali na dabbobi suna jagorancin sha'awar sha'awa. Shin wannan yana nufin cewa yarinyar daga misalin Kornei Ivanovich Chukovsky shine mai zurfin halitta? Behaves kamar dabba? A wata ma'ana, wannan ita ce hanya. Duk da haka, ba kamar dabba ba, yaron, a wata hanya, ya bayyana (fahimtar) halinsa, kuma daidai saboda ya bayyana shi, yana iya yin halin wannan hanya.
Idan yarinyar ta gane cewa manufarta ba ta da kyau, to ba ta yi haka ba. Amma ba ta gane wannan ba.
Abin da yarinyar ta ce shi ne ainihin "maganganu na ciki." Maganarta ba ta da wani jawabi ga wasu, amma ga kanta. Mai yiwuwa wannan zai zama abin ban mamaki ga wani, amma hakan yakan faru - har ma tare da tsofaffi (akalla, mutane masu girma) .Ya kasance a cikin wani abu da ya tabbatar da kansa.
Menene ya tabbatar da budurwa kanta? Cewa abin da yake dashi - ya dauki kyan cakulan - yana da kyau, daraja. Da farko kallo, ta gardama ba m: wani cakulan cakulan da yake da yawa tastier, mafi tsada, ya juya, "datti." Kuma cheap caramels ne "kyau." Amma idan ka yi la'akari kadan, to ya zama bayyananne: wanda ke nema - wannan zai samu. Matar jaririn na bukatar gano wani abu da caramels zai fi kyau fiye da zakulan cakulan - wannan shine abin da ta samo. Wani abu shine cewa bayyanar ba shine babban abu ba a cikin sutura. Ba a nufin su ba, don sha'awan su, amma har yanzu - domin su ci su. Amma yarinyar ta buƙatar cin abincin alewa, kuma ta tabbatar da kanta cewa ta yi sosai, bayan cin wannan alewa. Abin da ta gudanar ya yi. Wannan jariri ba mutum ba ne. Wannan karshen baya buƙatar tabbatar da kansa da wani abu. Kada kuyi tunanin ayyukanku nagari da daraja. Mutum - kana buƙatar. Wannan yaudara ta yaudara ta nuna cewa jariri dan mutum ne, tana so ya mutunta kanta, tana son zama mutum. Amma bai san duk da haka ba. Tsohon Sinanci ya ce: "Duk abin da yake cikin dabbobi yana cikin mutum, amma ba abin da yake cikin mutum yana cikin dabbobi ba."
Ku jefa kuri'a na karnuka yan 'yan nama. Kowane yana ƙoƙari ya kama abin da yake mafi kyau, fiye. Zai sami karfi, mafi girma, mugu. Amma kowane kare yana so ya kwace yanki mafi kyau. Don haka duk dabbobin suna nuna hali, don su ne na halitta. A gaskiya, irin wannan tsirarren Chukovsky heroine yayi daidai da wannan hanya. Amma ta iya yin haka, daga ra'ayin ɗan adam, mugunta, kawai saboda ta yaudare kanta. Na tabbatar da kaina cewa sha'awarta ba zato ba ne, amma dalili mai kyau. Wannan halayyar ne ga yara? Alas, yana da halayyar musamman!
Shin yakan faru da cewa yaro yana nuna mummunan hali, amma bai fahimci cewa yana yin wani abu ba daidai ba ta yaudare kansa? Haka ne, sau da yawa. A nan ne yara guda biyu suka yi yaki: sun kashe juna da kuma kulluma, kamar yadda yadudduka suka tashi. Ku zo. Mun bambanta. Kuma me muke ji? Dukansu suna fushi ƙwarai - babu, ba da kansu - da juna. "Kuma shi ne farkon da ya fara!", "Ba ya ba ni mota!" (Wani lokaci wani lokacin ya nuna cewa "mai aikata laifuka" bai ba mawallafinsa ba: me yasa, ina mamaki, shin dole ne ya ba shi?), "Kuma ya kira kansa!". Ni mai tsarki ne, kyakkyawa kuma, fushin da nake yi na adalci ne, shi kuma yana da laifi a kan kome. Ina tsammanin kana so ka ki yarda: a, kusan dukkanin manya suna nuna kansu! Haka ne, hakika. Duk da haka, wannan basa cikin ruhaniya da na ruhaniya - amma kawai akan girma. Wato, su "'ya'ya masu girma", "yara masu girma". Akwai yawancin su a cikin zamani. Gaskiyar manya ba sa son haka.
Abin da ke da kyau
Abubuwa na rayuwa: haɗari, sha'awar jin dadi a kan wasu, fushi, fansa, kishi - sau da yawa yakan jagoranci halin mutum marar ɗaba. Kuma ba kome ba ne yadda shekarunsa yake. Kuma aikin ɗan adam "I" a wannan yanayin ya rage don yaudare kansa: don tabbatar da cewa duk ayyukan na da kyau da daraja.
Wannan shi ne yanayin yaduwar mutum. Haka kuma Kornei Ivanovich Chukovsky ya fada game da wani yaron wanda ya yi rawar jiki: "Kuma ina da turɓaya a kasar!" Wani yaro yana cewa: "Ina da kwari a gado!"
Sai dai ya nuna cewa wayar da kanka ta dangi ne. Game da wasu mutane, da kuma, na farko, yara (domin tare da manya, yara ba su gwada kansu ba, suna ganin cewa ba shi da amfani garesu: manya yana da amfani mai yawa). Idan na fi wasu, na girmama kaina. Hakan ya juya, yaron ya sami girman kai, yana raina wasu.
Bugu da ƙari kuma, ba ya bukatar kowane maƙasudin abin da ya dace don girmama kansa. Wani abu da zai samu. Alal misali, yana da kwallun gado - kuma ɗayan baiyi ba. Aha! Yana da turɓaya sosai a kasar - kuma kasa da wasu. Aha!
Kuma shi ne ainihin (kamar yadda, hakika, duk abubuwan da muke bukata na ruhaniya da na ruhaniya, kawai abin da ake kira "bukatun zamantakewa" - alal misali, bukatun japuzzi - an samo.) Hakika, ba mu yarda ba idan jariri zai gamsar da shi duk rayuwarsa ta wurin yin alfahari ko a kan rashin wulakanci na wasu mutane. Kuma waɗannan su ne dukiyar mutum marar tsarki. Yana da mahimmanci a fahimci cewa "balaga" ko "bazuwa" na mutum shi ne manufar haƙiƙa. Yara (ko babba babba) kawai ba zai iya nuna bambanci ba, bai sani ba, kuma bai riga ya koya ba, n ka ba ya zama wani balagagge mutum daga shi ne m ga bukatar wannan. Amince, idan ba mu koyar da jariri yi wasa da Piano, shi zai zama m zuwa bukaci daga shi zuwa zauna a piano da kuma wasa da "Appassionata" Beethoven? Hakazalika, yanayin yana tare da halayyar mutum ko duniya na motsin zuciyarsa.
Sakamakon kalmomi
Kamar yadda muka gano, babban abu ga kowane daga cikinmu shi ne tabbatar da girman kai. Amma a nan shi ne tambayar: ta yaya mutum bai dace ba ya samu girma? Amsar ita ce a fili: saboda rashin wulakancin wasu, fariya, yaudarar kai. Kuma ta yaya mutum mai girma ya sami girman kai? Saboda wasu nasarori na hakika (alal misali, a cikin aikin ko cikin rayuwar iyali), kiyaye bin ka'idar dabi'a. Kuma menene ake tayarwa? A bayyane yake cewa samarda shi ne, saboda sakamakon haka jaririnmu ya zama cikakke. Babu shakka, upbringing ne mai tsanani kimiyya. Ga iyaye waɗanda suka fara fahimtarta, Ina so in yi hakuri da haƙuri da juriya a cimma burin burin. Gano mafita daidai yana taimaka mana fahimtar duniya da kuma ƙaunar gaskiya ga ɗanka.